Tales of the Bog - A cautionary tale about men, women, and mud

Men are not as smart as donkeys. How do I know this? Well, there is a saying in Dutch that says 'a donkey never hits the same stone twice'. Clever donkey!

Now let's look at this saying in regards to men. I think I may not be alone here, but quite often I'll suggest or say something which gets pushed under the table immediately. 'Nononononono, you don't do it like that', or, 'nonononono it'll be alright'. after which something goes wrong (often for the second or third time) and if I had been listened to in the first place, we could have avoided whatever mishap occurred.

Let's ponder this a while, as I take you a few weeks back into the past. This year has been a wet year. Not even minorly wet, but super wet. A few weeks back we decided to fix the electric fencing in the back paddock, so that Rufus wouldn't escape to the girls next door on a daily basis. We took the car, managed to get across the mudflat next to the new dam, did the fencing, everything was hunky dory.

On the way back (it had been steadily raining all day) we got to the mudflat, and yes.... we got bogged. Now rule number one (so I've been told -- by a woman) is never to spin the wheels. As soon as you feel you're bogged, stop.

So what did PJ do? He revved and revved, spun the wheels, and eventually the wheels were half sunk in this mud. I said, let's phone Ian to see if he can pull us out. Nononononono....

Next day, we ended up digging and digging, PJ spun the wheels a bit more, PJ had the nerve to use the wood I'd chopped for our fire to stick under the tyres ('I'll pull them out when we're finished!' -- Guess where they are now!). Me: 'Let's phone Ian and see if he can pull us out'. 'Nononononono!' Two hours later that was exactly what happened. It was quite funny listenening to half an hour of chinwagging, after which PJ finally got to the point. To cut a long tale short, Ian came over, managed to pull the ute out, and all was well. He was sniggering a bit as obviously PJ wasn't all too happy about having this accident happen, but admitted that he got bogged more often than anybody in the Valley so PJ shouldn't feel too bad. As we were having a beer looking out over the field, Ian said we probably shouln't drive in the paddock again until later in the year, or at least once the rain had finished. Nods all around, as we're all sensible beings after all.

Imagine my surprise when Friday PJ says to me, 'I'm going to pick up the wood from the back paddock, with the ute'. Me: 'Hmmmm I don't think that's a good idea, you'll get BOGGED.'

'Nonononononono, I know what I'm doing.' I repeated my concern, but to no avail. So off he went, only to come back a few hours later, sans car as it was stuck in the paddock.

In the evening we went over to Tanya & Jamahl for dinner, and PJ asked if Jamahl could pull him out. Jamahl proudly proclaimed he had never been bogged, and no worries mate! This had to happen early on Saturday morning as Tao had gymnastics to go to. On the way out, Tanya said to Jamahl, don't you get bogged now. 'Nonononono I never get bogged!'

There was a flurry of activity at 7am, then some more at 7.30am, and then around 8am PJ was back.

'How did it go dear?' A sheepish look, and yes, Jamahl also got bogged in the field. A case of the bogger becoming the boggee perhaps. So PJ had dropped him off at home and he was coming back later in the day to hopefully claim his car back from our greedy fields.

We spent the rest of the morning jacking up the car, putting the dry lovely wood underneath the wheels, and finally at around 1pm, everybody was free and happy in the field, getting out before The Bog got us again.

I couldn't help but take some photos of the guys ('please look sheepish now! Good!'). Jamahl was the funniest, he'd rather forget this day happened at all. After all, he never got bogged. Of course in my opinion this is worthy of a story, and let's face it, it's a noteworthy event if someone who never gets bogged gets bogged next to the person who shouldn't have been bogged a second time but did.

So, in summary, not only did we not get the dry wood out (it's all soaked and covered in mud) but we also managed to waste half a day digging out 2 cars.

Moral of the story: It may pay to listen to your female counterparts - it can stop you from getting bogged. It may also help your self esteem not to end up with egg on your face.

Will this happen you think? (Nononononononono....)

Two cars stuck in the mud.

Two sheepish guys who never get bogged.

Two sheepish guys and a couple of blondes.

Check out the full sequence of events.

So now we know why the proverb says 'A donkey never hits the same stone twice' -- it just wouldn't be correct otherwise...

~~~ The End ~~~

Nature Deficit Disorder

One of the most pleasurable parts of my day is feeding the cows in the early morning. No matter if it's cold or raining, it's soothing to listen to the girls munching on their bale of hay. On really good days there is little traffic and I can start imagining what the world would be like without the sound of engines. I will start hearing the birds, the sound of the wind.... And the girls munching.

Peaceful.

Then I have to go to work and something in me breaks. Apparently I'm suffering from NDD, or Nature Deficit Disorder. So spending time with my animals is therapeutic and something I should engage in more often :) Well, I say!

Do you sometimes also wonder about our thought processes? I sometimes wonder why we have been bestowed with the kind of brain we (well, some of us) have. Why we think so much about things, the world around us, how something works, until we tie ourselves into a knot that only further thought seems to get us out of. I was thinking about this when we saw the documentary "The trap: What happened to our dream of freedom" in which they ad infinitum debated the notion of negative democracy vs positive democracy, and what entails true individual freedom. It was very interesting but the discussions sometimes went in circles and circles until they ended up merely debating semantics.

For the record, we live in a negative democracy, where the government controls how we think and what we value. We are promised freedom through being able to obtain anything we possibly want - but within strict guidelines set by the government. We certainly live in a society where we are told that purchasing things makes us happy and most likely 99.9% of the population goes along with this notion. But in essence, our lives are empty and we are increasingly unhappy.

I suppose there are two ways of looking at this. If you are a happy consumer, then how could your life be empty? Isn't your life only empty if you are not a happy consumer but you're still trapped in the harness of conformity and you go along with what society expects of you (consume, buy, have a job, get promotions, get a bigger house). Then again there are people who want to be part of this consumer dream but haven't got the money to participate, so they are unhappy. Anyway, round and round it goes.

Recently I read a book, called A world without bees (Alison Benjamin and Brian McCallum). It talks about the mysterious collapse of bee colonies, called CCD (Colony Collapse Disorder) that is affecting beehives everywhere, and what would happen if the bee disappeared altogether.

The authors visited almond orchards in California, where 80% of the world's almonds come from. The area spans 240,000 hectares, and when you go there it's just rows and rows of trees, symmetrical, square, and nothing else but these trees in sight.

Each year beehives are flown or trucked in from all over the country and abroad, to pollinate these almonds. After the bees are finished there, they continue on to the citrus plantations in Florida, then north for apples and cherries, then east for blueberries. Sometimes they are in wobbling trucks for days.

This is a multi-billion dollar industry, so it must go on at all cost. Fancy the pesky little bee critters dropping dead all over the place and causing this economy grief! The book became more and more depressing as it went on - what, as a species, are we doing I ask myself, how can we so selfishly affect other beings no matter how small?

They narrowed down the mysterious deaths of billions of bees to the following possible causes:

• pesticides (especially Imidacloprid)
• monocrops
• stress
• inbreeding

Monocrops can only survive through pesticides, which end up all through the food chain. This weakens organisms and make them more susceptible to pests. Add to that being fed a single food type, and the ensuing malnutrition weakens the bees further. The stress of being travelled around, the quest for breeding the bees with the least painful sting and the largest honey collecting capacity... I don't think I need to go on, you get the drift.

At one stage in the book, they ask this guy who works in the almond orchard if all the travel was stressing the bees. Here is his answer:

It's got to be stressful. [pause...] Well everything is stressful. Getting out of bed to meet this guy at 4.30 this morning was stressful. Whether it's more stressful for the bees or me I'm not sure.

The chemical Imidacloprid disorientates the bees, impairs their memory and communication, and causes nervous system disorders. Of course, the company who makes this pesticide claims
there is no harm done.

Incidentally, for those who use the product Advantage to control fleas on your loved pets, guess what the main ingredient in that is. And yet, there we are, happily slapping this shit on our animals with not a second thought of how on earth fleas could be killed for months at a time. Think about it for a minute the next time you squirt something innocent looking on the neck of Spot or Ginger.

Anyway I won't go on about it - you may as well read the book if you're interested - but here is an (incomplete) list of foods that require the honey bee: Nuts, soya beans, onions, carrots, broccoli, sunflowers, apples, oranges, berries, melons, avocado, peaches, tomatoes, alfalfa, grasses. In China the environment is already so stuffed that they have to hand pollinate - a painful slow process involving loads of people and chicken feathers. It would sound kinky if it wasn't so sad. Is that what we're willing to get to for the sake of making a lousy dollar now? Reading the interviews with those who are making megabucks from the almonds in California, it is.

A friend of mine in the US told me that she had trouble getting tomatoes from her plants - loads of flowers, but no pollination. They were told to shake the plants to release the pollen. This worked, but again, isn't it sad to see out yet another creature due to our selfish monetary pursuits?

Who are we anyway? A lot of things I see happening makes me think we're the dumbest species on earth, stupid and selfish. Do we really have the right to keep on living and acting as we are? And of course I know that we will, as we'll only stop when there is nothing else left to destroy or take.

So thinking about the plight of the bees again, what can we do as individuals.... I'm reading an excellent book, a birthday present from my sister, called Edible Forest Gardens. These books (yep, it's a big read over 2 volumes) talks about mimicking forests to grow our food. Growing food in a mimicked forest helps provide a rich environment for everybody, including local wildlife. You don't need pesticides because by planting a variety of trees, bushes and undercover you create natural barriers. You attract both pests and pest predators so nature keeps itself in check. It discusses companion planting (did you know that comfrey and pear trees are mutually beneficial!). I'm working on changing our orchard to this principle. Planting a multitude of flowers, flowering shrubs and berry bushes, provides food and shelter for a range of insects, including bees.

So there is something positive. And to finish on something even more positive, Alberta had the cutest girl calf, and Ems gave birth to a beautiful little black girl as well last night. Mums and daughters are all fine! Although Emma's is obviously the most special and can also be a milker being half Jersey/Dexter, Alberta had the most unusual beautiful little calf. I hope she can go to a good home!

Alberta's little girl

Tickertytock

A great day in Ferenginar (if you're a Ferengi)

Ferenginar: A Class M planet, homeworld of the Ferengi.
It always rains.
Always.
Heavily.

That's where I thought we were based the last few weeks, as it has just not stopped raining. Friday when I went to feed the girls, I found we had a stream going through the front paddock, it sounded quite amazing but by now it would be nice to have some dry spells so that I can take the 3 lots of washing in that have been hanging out there for quite a while now.

Still, we have been very happy, mainly because Friday morning we both woke quite gloomy thinking of Cookie, right after I'd had a load of nightmares about her having gone. We were speculating about what could have happened and if she had suffered when all of a sudden we heard a wail by the backdoor. We only have one cat who wails like that, and imagine our surprise, she had returned!! She was super skinny and weighed next to nothing, so we've been feeding her up on fresh beef and keeping her inside. There seems to be nothing wrong with her although she is rather frail, so we're very, very happy.

Apart from that, we had a long weekend (Friday and Monday off!) so we got stuck into doing some more fencing, chopping wood, and working on the laundry area. The floor is now nearly laid, which means the house is then really nearly finished. Marjorie and I got together to work on a piece, Navarra, by Pablo Sarasate. It's a piece for 2 violins and piano, and it's very challenging. We reckon we may be able to play it by December, which works out at one page a month for us to learn it. A bit daunting in other words, but it already started to sound nice.

We got Porter back in little boxes last week, and it is the most beautiful meat we've ever tasted. It really does have yellow fat (courtesy of the Jersey milk) and it practically melts in your mouth. I'm very happy to be eating truly organic, chemical free, happy meat. We have half and Steve & Marjorie have the other half. Steve said he can still taste the cream in the meat, and reckons he's living a protein lover's wet dream.

Satch is off to the vet on Friday... to be neutered. We thought long and hard about it, but it just doesn't seem to make sense to keep him intact, with all the problems that come along. Puppies would be nice, but who would have to look after them and where would they go?? So really this is the only sensible option. Of course every time I went into the kitchen today Satch rolled on his back, displaying his rather large balls to the world, giving me a goofy smile. I did feel guilty and so he had lots of belly rubs today.

I dreamt last night that I was made redundant. Sadly, this appeared not to be true today.

Ode to Cookie

I'm superstitious as I post this - part of me still hopes that she'll come back but.......


Cookie

A midget tiger you were
As fearsome as they'd come
You would take on anyone
without a second thought.

You had such spirit
Animals ten times your size
were scared to death
it only took just one of your looks
and they'd scramble.

I can't recall the amount of times
you came home, limping,
a hole in your side, your chin
how often did we patch you up
and you would be out there again
defending what you saw
as your territory.

Remember when you were upset
with the big red tom next door
attacking Snuffie, the
biggest sook of all
Big Red ripped your chest
you nearly ripped out his eye.
I was proud of you
my warrior princess.

You were happiest alone
this was obvious after
Snuffie left us
to cross into the great unknown.
How you hated BB's arrival
not to mention Cannonball
And what about Satchmo,
the biggest lump of all,
in your eyes.

You fixed them with your iron gaze
hissing and spitting.
BB knew you were a softy underneath
He licked your head,
cuddled up to you
and you'd let him, begrudgingly at first.

Cannon took longer
after a year of cat fights
it took two flights
and a night at the airport
before you accepted him.
Then, you were happy with the three of you.

Satchmo never got there
You did not tolerate him,
he ran at the sight of you
all 40kg of him
what a boofhead.
And you, what a silly sausage,
for not showing your other side.

This other side
not many people saw.
From the time PJ picked you up,
people would comment on
the skinny unfriendly cat,
the one hit with the ugly stick,
never believing you were the cuddliest
of all.

13 years we spent together
From the first time we arrived in Oz.
You were an independent free soul
But forever faithful to us
a 2-person cat.

You nearly didn't make it to this place
the heat in the West got to you,
I didn't want you to fly if you were sick.
As if you understood,
you got better, and flew in a plane
at the ripe age of 12.

You loved Tas
the bushes around the house
the hayshed
the fresh air
A lovely time for you
We thought you'd last
a long time,
in your twilight years.

The last few days you were so cuddly
You slept in my arms,
not moving one muscle
You appeared content
if not a little shivering
and clingy.

Now it's cold outside
and you are gone
as if you were never here.
I've been looking for you
but I can't find you
I looked for you everywhere
but I have not found you.

It's been 3 days now and
deep down
I know you're not coming home.
It's freezing overnight
you have no food
you're not as fast as you once were.

Maybe this is how you wanted to go
A final farewell the night before
before going to your last resting place
that no one knows but you.
Never one to make a fuss.

But I will still miss you
my silly girl.

May you run free
in your choice of heaven
no doubt full of birds, mice and
tall trees
where you will be young again.

Cookie - Warrior Princess

Into the wild

Over the weekend we watched a movie called 'Into the wild'. It's the true story about Christopher McCandless, a young man in his early twenties, who rebels against his upper middle class family, society's values and demands, and goes off to do his own thing. He donates $24,000 of his life savings to Oxfam, and lives on next to nothing, finding bits of work when he runs out of money. He travels around for two years taking on the nickname Alexander Supertramp, finally ending up in Alaska, where it was always his dream to live in solitude off the land for a few months. He arrives there in April and wanders off into the wilderness with 10 pounds of rice, a .22 rifle, and a load of books including a guide to the region's edible plants. He crosses a stream and finds an old bus where he makes his basecamp. For about three months he manages to catch small animals and lives off these as well as berries and roots. At one stage he kills a moose, but as he is neither skilled in butchering nor smoking, the meat spoils and he ends up with nothing. By the time he's worked whatever it was out of his system, he backtracks to the road only to find that the river, which was a mere stream at the end of winter, has swollen with all the glacial meltwater and he can't cross it, so he is trapped. He goes back to the bus, where eventually he starves to death. His body was found a few weeks after his death in his sleeping bag, weighing only 30 kg.

If he had had a map of the area, he would have found that only 1/4 of a mile from where he tried to cross the river there was a hand operated tram where he could have pulled himself across, or he could have gone to a nearby trail and walked out in about 2 days, which he would have been capable of at that point. Local people have pointed out that unless you're totally unaware of the land, it's nearly impossible to starve to death during Summer.

So, there seem to be two opinions about this young man. One is that he is some kind of hero, living out his dreams and meeting with an unfortunate ending. The other is from people who are more adept at surviving in the wilderness and local Alaskans, who find him an intolerable fool, who got himself killed for no reason at all.

I mostly find the story just tragic. Part of me finds him incredibly stupid (but haven't we all done incredibly stupid things in our twenties, although without losing our lives), and part of me finds him admirable for doing his own thing. Mostly I just find it so tragic that he died the way he did, for no reason at all (unless he did have a serious death wish and then I wonder why he didn't shoot himself in the head with his .22 rather than suffer the pain of slowly starving to death). He would have been able to have the same experience but not lose his life if only he had even had a map of the area. And why didn't he scout the area he was living in for over two months, or why didn't he follow the river when he found he couldn't cross it... Those to me are basic survival skills, or it's even just plain common sense. But anyway. There is one photo of him where he holds up his final goodbye note and waves to the camera. He looks super thin, and must have known by then that it was going to be the end of him. He doesn't look sad, angry or worried, just resigned, but at peace with himself and the world.

(found on http://www.thequietman.org/?p=186)
The note says: "I have had a happy life and thank the Lord. Goodbye and may God bless all!"

Ignoring the God references (we all have to have our flaws :P), I can understand that feeling as well - the last time we went trekking in Peru, I had acute altitude sickness and nearly lost my life on top of a mountain. I had resigned myself to the fact that I probably would not see the morning. I didn't feel worried or even sad though, I felt happy I was somewhere doing something I loved (and not sitting at work behind a computer) and I felt that if I were to die at that moment, I was content that I had achieved what I had, and that I had lived my life to the full.

As it happened, PJ packed our bags and although it was really hard, we walked off the mountain in the middle of the night, to a safer altitude where I slowly got back to normal.

Here is the ironic thing. From going to an acceptance to die, I straightaway went to making plans for the future when it appeared I was going to stay around for a bit longer. So, at about 5am that morning, I promised myself I was going to learn Jazz, something I had wanted to do for ages, as I now had a bit more time. And I did.

However, I'm not even sure if this experience profoundly changed me or not, like some people say a near death experience does. Life just seems to go on, new experiences override old ones until they become a distant memory of something that happened long ago. I suppose I try and live my life to the full, I try and not put off until tomorrow what I could do today. I try and listen more to my gut feelings and am slightly more accepting that things can change in an instant and that you may never have as long as you think, or would like.

How does all of this relate to our current circumstances? Well, I suppose that this young man was troubled as much as I am about the way we live our lives, and how we have lost what is, or perhaps should be, important to us as a human race. Like him, we have also left the rat race behind and re-evaluated what is important to us, regardless of what society thinks of what we're doing. Although not as extreme as he, we also try to 'live more off the land', and live a simpler lifestyle, trying to be as self sufficient as we can be.

He meets up with 'modern' hippies who are still caravanning around, congregating at spots around the US. I suppose with all the foreclosures and job losses you'll see more of that happening too.

Anyway... watch the movie and see what you think. If nothing else, it shows beautiful landscape shots of America, which has been truthful to the locations he really visited.

Adios,

Haiku moments

why mimick nature
when the prettiest bonsai
is made without us

Our forest, a
living, breathing thing... so
delicate yet strong

Every girl dreams of
knights and white horses but I
dream of just the horse

Your eyes so loving
who'd know the proud warrior
hiding underneath

Improvements over the past year (or so)

Sometimes it's good to look back to see what we have been doing to be 'better' for the environment - especially when I think we're not quite getting there yet (this list is in no particular order):

Vegies: We are growing a lot of our own vegies - we just managed to go 2 weeks without visiting the supermarket using only what we had in our house. What we are now buying we're buying in bulk, preferably in paper wrapping. Surprisingly our food was really nice, tasty and varied, lots of greens and pulses, soups and curries. Good this time of the year.

Dairy: Although I had to buy my first container of milk (I haven't been able to make myself drink it yet!) I've hand milked Emma for the last 10 months, making our own dairy products such as cheese, butter and yoghurt. I have 15 lots of 100gm butter left - I hope this is going to see us over Emma's dry period. Marjorie and Steve get a regular milk delivery - I use glass bottles for this which we all recycle. I've noticed I can freeze soft cheeses and PJ just found that milk can be frozen too - so that is something to bear in mind next year.

Meat: Porter is off to the butcher's on Sunday - he will provide us with 6+ months of organic meat. Half of him is going to Marjorie and Steve, and we get a huge amount of dogbones out of him too, which is good for Satchmo. Unfortunately the butcher still wraps everything in plastic. Might have a talk with him next time to see how/if we can change that.

Waste: We only put out our bin every 2 or 3 weeks - most of our waste we can now recycle. We have 3 compost bins, one for compost, one for the chooks, and one for the worm farm. Paper waste (wrappings etc) end up as starter material for our fire.

Electricity: We have decommissioned our electric stove and the electric hot water. We managed to remove 2 of our plugs from the electricity box, which feels and looks like an achievement. Hot water, heating, and cooking is achieved with our wetback woodstove, combined with the solar tubes for hot water on the roof. Next we are saving to put solar panels on the roof so we can go off the grid. We'll first need to build our shed though - that's where the panels will be put.

Water: Our water is rainwater - so everything we we use comes out of our own tanks. We recycle the bathroom water into a separate tank which is used for flushing the toilet. We decided against a composting toilet as our plumber said he doesn't do anything but ripping them out as they're not working well - it's too cold and damp here. They are also super expensive and we haven't got a lot of space under the house for a big system. We might revisit this at a later stage.

Transport: I work from home so I rarely use the car anymore to go anywhere. Unfortunately PJ now drives to Hobart 4 days/week, but he uses the more efficient car for this, and unfortunately while the world is still as it is, we need the mulah!

Debts: We are 2 months away from being debt free. That means we will need to work less (so we can spend more time working on our farm), not having to have the computer running 8 hrs a day will also be good.

Toiletries: I'm now in my 3rd week of having abolished shampoo and conditioner (2 less plastic containers to worry about). I 'wash' it with bicarb (comes in a cardboard box) and rinse it with apple cider vinegar (glass bottle - plastic lid unfortunately). I haven't used plastic sanitary items for over a year now, it's cloth items and a cup for me which works very well.

Recycling: We try and recycle where possible. The chookhouse was made of recycled wood - we only had to redo the roof as the old sheets were leaking. We have used old wood from the sheds for our raised beds in the vegie garden. Old beds become vegie pen doors. We recently realised we can use the metal roof sheets to cover the wood for our stove.

Where I would still like to do better....

Cat litter! We use a lot of the stuff and I can't put it in the doggie compost (separate from our other composts and vegie growing areas of course!!) as it doesn't decompose. I've tried using recycled paper, but the kitties hate it and I can't blame them, it's soggy and gross. The catlitter also still comes in a plastic bag. I'm considering trying sawdust. The cat and dog biscuits come in big plastic bags. When I have more time, I should be able to make it myself.

Less plastic wrapping!!! It's painful going to the shop and still buying stuff that is triple or quadruple wrapped in plastic. I refuse plastic bags by carrying my own reusable bags, but still. All kinds of drinks (PJ's orange juice) comes in these huge plastic bottles, it drives me nuts.

Planning! Make more cheese so that we don't have to go and buy it anymore. Admittedly I've had little time with a full time job on top of everything else, but it would be good to be able to be self sufficient in that respect. Also, I've noticed that when I wrap my cheese in cloth or just let it dry on the outside, it works just as well (and tastes just as good) as when I dip it in wax - so that's another cost saving.

Vegie growing! Links in with the above really... But try to get better at estimating how much we need to grow. For example, when growing our potatoes, we keep on eating them in about 4 weeks. Next time we're not going to put them in the potato bin, but just plant them in a bed. See if that gives a better result.

That was it for today...